


Milky Way

by Ceia



Category: One Piece
Genre: Angst, Fluff, M/M, space
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2015-06-07
Updated: 2015-06-07
Packaged: 2018-04-03 09:28:03
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 7,266
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/4095793
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Ceia/pseuds/Ceia
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Several nights of stargazing, spread over several adventures, bring the first mate and his captain closer and closer together.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Milky Way

**Author's Note:**

> I wrote this two years ago and forgot I'd ever finished it. So, I figured I'd post it up anyway as it's been too long since I was active here and I was really happy with it at the time. Hope you enjoy it!

At first the sky was cloudy, and everything was dark.

The ship, carried gently forward on the waves of a calm night, sails slowly into a curtain of light. Sitting outside beside the mast means it washes over him as it filters through the sails and pours across the grassy deck, and he stirs from a doze he wasn't supposed to have slipped into, groaning vaguely from the brightness. But he’s grudgingly forgiving when he glances upwards and finds a very pleasant sky looking down at him - the stars' good evening to complement the sun's good morning which will follow a few hours from now.

In the middle of the night, in the middle of an unknown sea, the moon shines brighter than it has done in months. It sprinkles the same glitter over the waves that one would expect from sunlight. Whitens Sunny as if drenching it in luminous bleach, gives the soft green grass of the lawn an almost dewy glaze. Following a hot day the air is balmy even now, but it's cooled by a midnight breeze, and the temperature is comfortably mild. The wind rustles his hair, short though it is, and feels very refreshing. 

Quiet, peaceful, dark and bright, it's been a long time since the last night like this, and when the lingering clouds drift away the full magnificence of the night sky is finally exposed. He smiles a bit, gazing out at the wide expanse above, and finds himself grateful to have been scheduled for lookout duty tonight.

Above them, surrounding them, is space. It looks a little like someone has tripped and spilled milk up there; there's a long pale splash cutting through the darkened sky like an enormous scar, and speckled as if flicked with paint. It's breathtaking, incredibly so on a night as clear as this one, and he knows it must be a very rare sight because it's the first time he's seen it in years. Thinks he's heard the name of this space phenomenon somewhere before- didn't the name have 'milk' in it or something? Maybe that was just his captain's wishful thinking. Maybe it was something else entirely. 

Nami probably told him what it was a long time ago but he can’t quite remember what its name was, as he’s sure it had one. Though it’s lost on him by now he tries to remember nonetheless, frowning in his attempt to rewind two, three years before now.  
________________________________________

The crow’s nest on Merry is simply a circular bench high up on the mast. Lookout duty up here tonight, with the cool sea breeze after a hot day, is nice and peaceful until it is quite suddenly interrupted. 

"Oi," calls a voice below him, "I'm comin' up!"

Again? He'd been on the brink of falling asleep and grumbles when he realises he's being called. This happened the last time it was his turn to watch over the ship, too. "I've got this, Luffy, you can go back to bed," he lazily calls back, shifting to get comfortable again.

"Nah, it's cool. I’m bored and can’t sleep anyway!"

He yelps out in shock when Luffy - very much below him moments ago - drops suddenly into the crow's nest. Their time together on the ship has been so brief that he’s still unused to his captain's random exercises in gum-gum-travelling. Nor is he used to Luffy insisting that he shouldn't have to spend seven nights on his own up here, either. It's not as though he minds solitude. 

A bit too close for comfort, Luffy squirms and settles in beside him, and he’s not sure if he really wants this because actually he tends to prefer being on his own. He likes the quiet of being alone after a busy day spent with the crew, and god knows it’s a lot quieter up here than it is down there. But the captain, oblivious to his discomfort, diverts his attention by simply pointing up to the night sky. "Man, look at all those stars!" Luffy says, in awe. "Being up here makes you feel like you could touch ‘em!"

He follows Luffy's eyes almost sceptically. Hadn't been paying much attention before, but being all the way up here - high above the sea and the ship - does make the two of them seem pretty close to space. Closer than usual, at least. He smiles a bit. “Yeah. Hadn’t noticed before."

"Nami said if you looked hard enough, you could find patterns up there. She called 'em consultations or something." They're quiet for a short while as they search the sky for shapes. They point here and there, tracing silly patterns with their fingers, eager to find something. Soon they're talking normally, and then they’re laughing and it isn't until much later into the night, when they're getting slow and sleepy, that he realises sharing company with Luffy is actually quite fun. Eventually though Luffy says goodnight and jumps down from their happy perch, promising another consultation night next time. 

He feels a bit sad that he has nobody to talk to for the rest of the night, which isn’t really like him at all. Nonetheless, he thinks he could get used to it – to company while he’s on lookout duty, and begins to look forward to the next time it's his turn to watch over Merry.  
________________________________________

This week, it's only his second night up in the crow’s nest and Luffy has already come to join him. The captain's visits tend to be sporadic and he doesn't usually come until the fourth or fifth evening, so tonight is a pleasant surprise. Very much used to Luffy’s company by now, he knows to scoot over when the captain announces his presence with a simple Yo!, and in the blink of an eye they're settling in together as if they're about to watch a movie. The ship is rocking a little more than usual tonight, travelling fast on a particularly strong current, heading somewhere of its own accord. But the sky above is dense and murky and unsuitable for their usual stargazing. Well shit, he thinks, disappointed. Luffy will probably leave. 

Luffy is indeed somewhat disappointed when he looks up to find nothing but thick black cloud staring down at them. But the disappointment is brief, as is the quiet pause between them; soon enough Luffy presents some meat he stole from the kitchen. “Midnight feast!” he proclaims with a huge grin, and they tuck in. Between mouthfuls of Sanji’s best roast chicken they talk about Alabasta, Luffy’s brother, Crocodile, and their new crewmate. Lately, things have been pretty eventful for the Straw Hats, so he’s glad that they have an opportunity like this to catch up and shoot the shit. 

He doesn't trust Miss All-Sunday, and remains stubbornly unconvinced despite the fact that Luffy is so very excited to have had her join the group. Keeps these doubting thoughts to himself anyway, though, because greater than his distrust for Nico Robin is his faith in their captain. If Luffy believes in her, well, like it or not, he'll just have to believe in Luffy. He certainly won’t be able to change Luffy’s mind any time soon, after all. 

Gradually he relaxes, smiling at the bright face of his delighted captain who’s just happy to welcome another crew member. Besides, it's kinda… cute? – endearing, it’s endearing - when Luffy's so happy about something. Although that particular thought is but a brief whisper promptly drowned when Luffy vocally remembers he brought some sake for them too, and earns himself an affectionate hair-ruffle in thanks. 

Hours pass without the light of stars and they talk and talk and talk, words both eased and slurred by alcohol. They joke, reminiscence and tease, as they’ve had a fair few adventures already for such a small crew. And then, as the sea calms, the ship slows, and the clouds begin to clear, all of a sudden the sky is raining light down over them. It’s as though Merry has consciously slowed now that it’s reached this place, even though the sea stretching out ahead of them appears no different to the sea they have just come from. 

No, the difference to this place is in the sky. It takes a while for the clouds to fully shift, but when they do a giant scar is exposed. "Woah," Luffy murmurs, eyes widening at the strange new thing that seems to have appeared in the sky. His hat flips up in a gust of wind and threatens to fall in front of his eyes, so he pushes it back behind his neck and shakes choppy black bangs out of his eyes. 

It's the first time they've ever seen such a thing in the sky. Luffy wonders aloud, "Y'think Nami will know what that is?", and nudges him with a grin. 

"Huh... maybe." When he looks down from the strange lilac coloured streak covering the sky, he finds himself observing his captain, whose cheeks are a touch pink from the alcohol, whose lips are pulled into one those rare, more subdued smiles, unguarded and simple unlike the usual showy grin telltale of overconfidence. Luffy’s shoulder is smooth, round and warm, pressed close, and the slope of his neck, his smooth skin, is exposed in moonlight.

Though he’d never say it out loud, he can see why some of their enemies have completely underestimated Luffy’s physical strength – the frame which holds it is deceptively small and slim. And though Luffy doesn’t exactly look fragile – he knows Luffy too well to ever associate such a word with him – there’s something about his captain which makes him look just a little bit vulnerable as they sit here under the stars.

It makes something in his stomach lurch, which is weird and new to him and he’s not sure if he likes it. As though he’s just slipped and quickly moved to right himself, except he hasn’t moved at all. He’s just sitting here looking at Luffy.  
His captain’s eyes are bright, reflecting the light of a thousand stars, and for the first time he can see that they are brown, Luffy has brown eyes, not black. And it’s such a dumb realisation when they’ve been nakama for how long by now? But he's never been this close to Luffy before, never been in a good enough light to notice. Never paid him that much attention. Never really looked at him like this before, under the light of a full moon and a strange scar up in space.

Luffy's brown eyes blink, and then they're looking curiously into his own, that soft smile now pointed at him. The look, all bright and warm and with depth that he didn’t think could exist in a person’s eyes, least of all Luffy’s, makes a heavy and ominous weight drop deep and suddenly inside his stomach. It’s far worse than the feeling of slipping, as though the darkness leaking from the sky’s pale scar is pouring right into him, drowning him. All from one simple look. 

His lips part as if to say something, but his mind is blank and his throat constricts and he just. Can’t stop looking into those damn eyes. 

Maybe it's just the sake or the curse of the strange thing in the sky putting things in his head, making him see things that aren’t really there. Whatever it is, he is suddenly that much more aware of Luffy’s presence. His closeness. Their thighs are pressed together from the bowed angle of their legs, and he can feel the warmth radiating from Luffy through the denim of his shorts. Notices how Luffy’s hair all choppy and dark is a bit windswept, looks soft and tousled… and again, kinda… the only word which comes to mind is cute. 

Luffy shifts a bit as if in response to being stared at, as though he’s been asked a question and responds with a curious movement. Having those brown eyes looking at him – and also having sensed a vulnerability he didn’t know was there - kind of makes him want to get closer. Er. Quite a lot closer, the longer he holds Luffy’s gaze. Shit. In fact, his body shifts in wanting to get rid of the space between them and - and -

All at once, he is incredibly, overwhelmingly attracted to his captain – to rash, crazy, carefree Luffy - and he has to quickly grip the bench and look away to stop himself from moving. This sudden and rather horrifying realisation makes that awful weight inside him ten times heavier – heavier than any of the weights he lifts, heavier still than the responsibility of taking care of their crew. There’s just something about the boy sitting beside him, something in those warm brown eyes and the look of blank and innocent curiosity on his face, which has completely and utterly bewitched him.

How can looking into someone’s eyes drag down on him this much? What the hell is this, where did all this shit come from, and more than anything else in what world should he ever find Luffy, his captain, attractive?

Red-faced and pointedly looking down at his boots, he decides that it Must be the alcohol. Meat must’ve been off. He's certain, and shakes his head when Luffy, apparently having been in a bit of a gormless daze himself, asks him what's up - "Nothing, don't worry" - and luckily they carry on talking like nothing has happened. Well, for the most part. He’s a little quieter now, a little more hesitant to commit to speech while that awful feeling is still pooled in his stomach.  
Tries to act normally, but finds that he struggles to meet Luffy’s eyes again, and when they do- when Luffy says goodnight, and smiles that same soft smile as before – he feels as though he’s about to be sick.

________________________________________

The next couple of times he's scheduled to watch over the ship, Luffy joins him for several days in a row and then eventually every single night. The captain no longer needs any greeting to announce himself. The others have also accepted that this is what happens now, and no longer question Luffy about his nightly, coincidentally week-long stints outside.

During the day, when they're off the ship, when it isn't his turn for lookout duty, their interactions are far more limited. Sometimes Luffy will bother him during a nap – a bother which is always welcome, though he likes to pretend otherwise – but mostly they’re occupied doing other things. The time that they spend together properly is concentrated, at night, here where they're alone. But he doesn’t mind if it means he’s allowed Luffy all to himself on these otherwise lonely crow’s nest evenings- and sleeping as much as he does during the day brings these nights around much faster than if he was awake. 

They talk regardless of the weather, subject and time, often until the sun is rising and it's time to wake up. The others talk about them in hushed voices, and sometimes they’ll be sneakily watching at night, noses poked around windows and doors to try and get a look at the crow’s nest. Many times he’s had to cover Robin’s ear with anything that happens to be lying around- including Luffy on occasion, who playfully protests when he’s picked up and plonked down on the offending eavesdropping spot. 

They’re probably just being nosy, enjoying having something to gossip about. Chopper and Nami both approached him the other day and attempted to ask him about Luffy, as a matter of fact. Tch. As if it's any of their business. They're just friends – what else is there to talk about? Nothing, and he’d told them as much too.

But that feeling of sickness which started several weeks ago is now constantly there in his stomach, disguising itself as a lingering ache in a deep dark pit inside of him which sharpens and hurts when Luffy smiles, laughs, meets his eyes for longer than a moment. It’s like he’s anxious all the time, over nothing, nothing at all.

Anyway, thanks to rigorous meditative training he can mostly pretend that it’s not there, and tells himself that it’s just the food, it’s just the air, it’s just the curse of that one night when he looked at Luffy illuminated by the scar in the sky, that’s making him feel this way.

Luffy continues to laugh and smile like normal – for him, nothing has changed, nothing is wrong or strange about their meetings. Sure they sit closer, sure Luffy tends to fall asleep on him sometimes. Pokes and prods, irritates, teases, fights with him more than usual, all ploys for attention and he of course gladly, helplessly obliges, because as much as it worsens the ache inside he’s come to find that it’s the only way to satisfy it, too. 

They’re not on Merry anymore, which means they’re no longer confined by a small circular bench but have, instead, a dedicated observation room. Comfortable and spacious, Luffy’s increasing closeness is unnecessary but, of course, welcome. If anything, Luffy seems to make more of an effort to stay close because they have so much room- testament to their closeness as friends, of course, what the hell else could it be? It’s not like Luffy could ever feel anything other than friendship. He’s not the one with the sickness from that scar in the sky. 

He's trying not to read into things. In fact, he's trying to forget and ignore these feelings, these thoughts which seem to threaten him. If he found out, he’d throw you overboard. You can’t keep hiding it. You can’t pretend that there’s nothing wrong. But it, this, these close meetings in the dead of night have reached a point where he dreads their time together as much as he's come to crave it. 

Did those brown eyes curse him that night, or is it just a curse he must carry until they next encounter the scar stuck in space? Regardless of the reason, Luffy has – something has utterly intoxicated him, to the point where even making eye contact with his captain makes that ache inside him spike into something terrifying. A hunger, a craving, something gnawing at him from the inside and refusing to stop until it is satisfied, but the route to satisfaction threatens rejection and rejection from Luffy is something that he absolutely cannot deal with. 

It takes all of his willpower on these nights when Luffy nestles in close to him, playfully fights him with him, to control himself. You’re reading into it. Into everything. He’s going to be the pirate king, not the lover of a man who is supposed to be his trusted friend. 

Of course, the more he hides from and tries to reject his feelings, the harder they are to control. The more Luffy coddles and teases, the harder it is to push him away. The one time he allows himself to hook an arm around Luffy when he’s sure the boy is asleep, he doesn’t sleep for the whole night and most of the subsequent day and exhausts himself to the point of genuine illness. Never again, he regretfully resolves afterwards, and is disgusted by himself for allowing emotions like that to have made him ill.

Inevitably, he breaks one evening when the teasing goes too far. This time during a play fight Luffy doesn't stop until he has climbed into his lap. Gets too close, knees brush up against all the wrong places, he's laughing and the sound is drunk and sweet and his breath is so close he can taste the acidic scent of the sake they shared. "It's Robin, isn't it! You like Robin!"

"No, I don't--!"

"Nami then! You like Nami!"

"No, Luffy, I -don't--"

"No way, then it's gotta be USOPP--!"

He can't stand it anymore. With reflexes fast as if he was drawing swords he grabs Luffy by the arms, fingers digging into the lithe muscles hidden away inside, and the hunger is so ravenous he feels he could either kiss or kill his captain. Instead, every muscle in his body tenses up as he resists the desperate urge to bring them together, to close that space between them once and for all. It takes all of his willpower to then throw Luffy off and away from him, and the rubberman crashes against the floor of the crow’s nest with a startled yelp. 

Luffy would normally think that it’s all some big drunk joke, but the look in Zoro’s eyes, the indents on his arms from the strength of that grip, the- the sheer force behind that throw tell him otherwise. Wide eyed and unnaturally quiet, Luffy shifts as if to move close again, to ask what’s wrong. But he's told sharply –barked at - to stay away from now on because he's just- he's just done with this, okay, these fucking visits have to stop! 

And then, because Luffy simply does not understand, they argue.

The look on his captain’s face is one which Zoro will never forget, when their throats are raw and there’s nothing left for them to say. Hurt, betrayal, confusion and even disappointment. Nor will he forget the moonlight shining on the back of Luffy’s waistcoat – orange instead of red, at the moment- when he slowly moves over to the window, pauses for a long time, and then jumps from the crow's nest without another word or looking back. 

Zoro kicks away the empty sake bottles littered at his feet and they smash as they impact the opposing walls, scattering glass all over the soft carpet. He's disgusted with himself, and sits with his head in his hands and his heart heavy, pounding hard and hurting so very, very much. His face becomes damp in his palms and his nails, blunt though they are, scrape his forehead until the skin is pierced and bleeds. 

It's the first time Zoro has been overcome by the sky’s scar sickness. The first time he has lost control of it, grabbed Luffy and- and of things, rejected his attention. And still he has been unable to admit his feelings to either of them – unable to accept that he’s hopelessly in love with Luffy, that it’s ruining him to the point where he'd rather hurt Luffy than admit how he feels.

The rest of the evening is cold and lonely, and Zoro knows he can’t look Luffy in the eye again until he swallows his fear and confesses the cure. 

________________________________________

Luckily there is little time to dwell on things after that incident. Everybody awkwardly manages to carry on as if nothing has happened, although it's plain to see that their swordsman is miserable and their captain is uncharacteristically listless. Before there's time to get involved, the very same day the crew meet (and in Luffy's case befriend) an abandoned skeleton who has lost his shadow, and they make it their mission to help him get it back. 

Of course, this mission ends up turning into something much bigger and more complex than simply retrieving a lost shadow. These things always do when the Straw Hats get involved. But it allows everyone a distraction, a revitalisation for a while, until it's time to come home to Sunny once again with a new member in tow. 

Spirits are pretty high following the adrenaline of adventure. Even their captain’s mood has dramatically improved, as quickly as his wounds seemed to heal, and normality appears to be resuming aboard Sunny- although that may have something to do with the fact that the main cause of the problem has been mostly unconscious.

It's going to take a very long time for Zoro to heal from his mysterious injuries, though he’s regained consciousness now. The shitty cook begrudgingly offers him more food than usual and he can take his usual naps without anyone trying to bother him, though his alcohol allowance has been frustratingly reduced to zero. Chopper insists that although the schedule says otherwise he should not go on lookout duty this week, but naturally Zoro shrugs this off, and the others know better than to try and stop him. So he simply waits until Chopper is asleep before climbing up the crow’s nest on his first allocated night of duty, determined to trick himself into believing that everything is normal, everything is okay. 

Wincing the entire way, Zoro’s bones and muscles ache sharply in protest as he climbs up the ladder- a task which usually takes ten seconds but tonight takes several minutes and utterly exhausts him. But Zoro grits his teeth, refuses to shirk his duties just because of some bloodloss and bruises, and collapses into the crow’s nest when he reaches the top. Drags himself over to the cushioned bench by the window and attempts to relax, groaning as he shifts around attempting to find some comfort. It’s not a bed, but it’s better than that old wooden lookout on Merry at least, and for the first time in ages he feels somewhat and inexplicably better about things. 

A few minutes later Robin comes up to replace him, a book in the crook of her arm and a glass of wine in hand. When he makes it clear that he doesn’t want, or need, any company, Robin looks at him for a moment before smiling very softly and returning, wordlessly, downstairs. He glares in her direction, willing her to leave faster, having felt _you need to tell him_ emanating from her in a gaze as subtle as Sanji’s flirtations. 

Alone and in peace, Zoro sighs shakily as he leans into the cushions supporting his back. Tired, he considers the events on Thriller Bark, and inevitably the events beforehand, sure that once he’s healed from this the darkness lingering inside him will heal too. Naturally his heart still hurts as he’s not yet on speaking terms with Luffy - but if it’s the burden he must carry to keep the peace on Sunny and with his captain, then so be it. 

With a heavy heart Zoro looks out of the window, eyes empty and tired and circled in darkness, hoping that in the morning things might somehow be better, that feelings he doesn’t want to admit are unchanged may dissolve with the night sky’s clouds. 

He’s just gonna have to get over it. 

________________________________________

Luffy, while an impeccably dependable captain, is neither the sharpest of the Straw Hats or the most perceptive. But he knows, absolutely knows that something big happened at Thriller Bark - something to do with him, and of course, something to do with Zoro. He can’t quite place it yet, can’t quite figure it out no matter how much he scowls and paces and thinks, but he knows that something happened, and he knows that they’re all keeping something from him. Everyone is avoiding the topic when he brings it up, and that’s clue enough for the rubberman as the Straw Hats usually LOVE to gossip after an adventure. 

It’s partly the reason why he followed Zoro up to the crow’s nest and waited carefully just below the hatch until he knew that the bruised swordsman had fallen asleep. For one thing, Luffy couldn’t sleep anyway, and for another he wanted to finally resolve the thing that had happened between them because he can’t stand any unrest among the crew, not after Usopp, not after Merry, and more than ever now after almost losing Zoro.

Luffy climbs up into the observation room as quietly as he can, biting down on his lip from the concentration required to not be clumsy. The swordsman’s head has fallen against the pane of the open window and his mouth is wide open, the telltale signs of deep sleep. But Luffy frowns when he walks a little closer to Zoro to get a better look at him, and notices a crease in Zoro’s brow and the shine of something wet in the corner of his closed eyes. There are lines there, etched into tanned skin, which tell of a stress even in sleep. Luffy knows that that isn’t right. Zoro has never once before looked troubled during a nap – and Luffy should know, he’s watched Zoro nap a hundred or more times. What on earth has happened to upset Zoro so much – not only recently, but before Thriller Bark, before their argument? 

The concern it stirs in Luffy is enough to make him forget caution and the fear of waking Zoro up, in favour of reaching out to him, to delicately trace his fingertips along those lines marking the corners of Zoro’s eyes, between his brows, creasing his forehead. He wants to smooth those lines away. Wants to make things go back to how they were. Hates seeing Zoro looking like this, especially knowing that it was probably because of him. “If I’d told you that night,” Luffy mumbles to himself, “maybe this wouldn’t have happened.”

Luffy kneels beside his swordsman, taking a moment to just look over him again though this time while wearing a deep frown of his own. When did things between them become so weird and complicated that they can’t even talk to each other?

He thinks about what an adorable idiot his first mate is, his hilarious lack of direction and how his laughter used to hitch after a few drinks up on Merry’s lookout. How agitated he used to get when Luffy would wake him from a nap for attention. The sleepy smile he’d have on his face when dawn broke on them and they’d spent the entire night talking about the stupidest stuff imaginable. The things he said during their argument – I don’t want you to fucking bother me anymore, I’m sick of seeing your goddamn face when I just want to be on my own – which had cut Luffy worse than any sword he could wield because, at the time, Zoro had sounded so much like he meant it. 

He thinks about the way that Zoro had looked at him on that night with the white scar in space, a look that made his stomach do that weird flippy thing for the first time. The glint of his golden earrings in that bright moonlight. The feeling of a thousand tummy flips he had the one time Zoro put an arm around him and let Luffy rest his head in the crook of his neck in fake sleep, just to be near him, just to stay close to the Zoro he loved so much. The feeling he had when he’d found Zoro unconscious, dressed head to toe in bloodied bandages just a couple of days ago, as though the ground had slipped under his feet and he was falling, the weight of mortal fear in his stomach dragging him down and down and down. Nothing he could do or say to help his swordsman but simply stay away from him. 

The frown on Luffy’s face bends and suddenly a whimper escapes him. Overwhelmed by the fact that he’s allowed Zoro to get hurt like this, and possibly even worse that he’s allowed things between them to get so bad, he’s about ready to burst into tears. He’d been so, so stupid to believe all those awful things Zoro said, stupid things said by a stupid swordsman who clearly didn’t mean any of it otherwise he’d surely jumped ship. 

How could Luffy have been so afraid to just come out and say what needed to be said? Maybe if Zoro had known, he might’ve at least been able to understand that Luffy’s constant badgering was only the result of how much he cared. Secretly he’d been reasonably sure, deep down, that Zoro could’ve actually felt the same way. Was it that much of a stretch for them, to go from the closeness of friends to the closeness of something more? Luffy frowns again when the thought occurs, brows knotting together from the pressure of thinking as he tries hard to remember what evidence he had, what had happened to make him believe that his feelings might’ve been.. re..what was the word… requilted? 

In a moment of realisation so sharp that he almost jolts, Luffy recalls the way Zoro had looked at him right before he’d been thrown to the floor. It was the very same look on that night with the Milk-on-Whey in the sky that Nami told him about. The one which made Luffy feel this way for Zoro in the first place, in fact. Made him feel kind of like Zoro wanted him, cared about him a whole lot, and like they should maybe lean forward and kiss otherwise the moment will be gone and they’ll be indefinitely stuck in the stubborn limbo of requited uncertainty. 

And then, finally, Luffy remembers what Brook had said to him shortly before coming up here. 

_Luffy-san, if I may be so bold as to ask a rather personal question_

He remembers when he’d asked Nami the next day about the white scar they’d seen in space, and how he’d suddenly felt so sick, weak and hungry that Chopper had taken him aside for a medical and found that, oddly enough, all the signs pointed to lovesickness

_Do you not think that you are, perhaps, in love with Zoro-san_

He remembers that the others, who mostly saw Zoro’s isolated unsociable side, figured that the best course of action was for Luffy to tell Zoro himself; previous attempts to broach the subject were so fiercely rebuffed that the rest of the crew became scared to approach their swordsman again.

_And that he may in fact be in love with you?_

He remembers when, for the sake of peace between his crewmates, he decided to lock those weird romantic feelings away, because surely Zoro couldn’t feel the same way, surely it was selfish to impose on him and so much easier for everyone to just carry on being friends. 

As if Usopp has played the literal-light-bulb-above-head prank, Luffy abruptly deduces that the solution to both of their problems has been staring them both in the face the entire time. It’s so laughably, embarrassingly, wonderfully simple. In fact he can’t believe he hadn’t thought of it before, and the whimpering grimace on his face turns into a confident and resolute smile.

No more waiting. No more hesitating. With the determination of a captain ready to sail again, Luffy casts the anchor of uncertainty aside. He leans over the swordsman still sleeping beside him, cracking his knuckles, before setting both hands on Zoro’s shoulders.

“Hey,” Luffy says, and shakes him gently. “Zoro.”

Zoro is startled awake from the acute pain of having his damaged body shaken as well as the vocal alarm beside him. Oh god. He fell asleep. Where is he. Why is everything pain. Wait, why is- what- “—the hell’s going o—“ 

Zoro’s comprehension lasts for all of a second before Luffy swoops down and kisses him.

It takes them quite a while to find time to pause for breath. But thankfully, it’s not quite as long as it took for them to come together in the first place.

So much between them has been left unspoken for so long that, when they can finally tear their mouths off one another – and even then, only for a moment at a time – the words come out in an awkward, halting rush. _Why didn’t you – tell me – When did you – How long have you – damn stupid idiot – how couldn’t you tell -!_

They pour out after every heated, clashing kiss, mixing with mmphs and needy throaty groans as they desperately grab at one another. Both are aware of the time that’s been lost between them, now mutually eager to make it up; greater than the words left unsaid is quite clearly the tension that’s built not only in the time they weren’t speaking at all but also during all those nights spent alone together flirting. Lacking practice, the kisses turn somewhat sloppy; their jaws crash together sometimes perfectly and more often than not at a poorly judged and awkward angle. But all that matters is that their inexperienced is mutual - being shared right now, after so long.

To hell with the injuries, Zoro thinks, arms scrambling to haul Luffy directly onto his lap and hold him so tight, chest to chest, that he could burst. And when Luffy immediately responds by running fingers with such obvious need through his hair, along the back of his neck, keeping them pressed together in kiss after kiss after kiss, Zoro honestly wishes they could stay like this for the next year to make up for waiting so goddamn long. When the thought strikes him he clings to Luffy even harder – now that they’ve given in, every single second is precious. And they stay together like this until the moonlight has shifted, until Zoro finds that his crushed and weakened lungs mean he absolutely has to stop for a while, grimacing from the pain of taking deep and sharp breaths when they finally break for more than a couple of seconds.

Luffy leans away a bit to give his swordsman some room, but the knot of worry between his eyebrows is back. “What happened?” he asks, of course referring to the incident on Thriller Bark. “I know you did something but nobody will tell me.”  
The question is met with a dismissive ‘nothing’ and Zoro firmly shaking his head. But those lines are back on his face – creased, stressed and in pain. Luffy thought they’d have gone away by now, now that they’ve finally resolved their… thing.  
The sheer emotion alone is exhausting. Though as it pours out, through kissing and embracing, through stunted sentences, short breaths and fierce gazes, it’s an undeniable relief for the swordsman who had convinced himself that his heart would never stop hurting, and for the captain who believed that his first mate wanted out.

Luffy doesn’t like that he’s still in the dark about Zoro’s injuries. But right now, more important is the fact that Zoro is at least okay and right in front of him. Closes his eyes for a bit and tilts his head back, apparently riding out the pain.  
“I fell for you, dumbass," Zoro says. "That’s what happened.”

“Zoro is – the biggest idiot in the whole world,” Luffy murmurs at him, and though it’s a resentful murmur and his eyes are leaking he says it with a huge smile. Brings his hands forward from where they were buried in soft green hair to cup his swordsman’s face, gazing at him mostly adoringly but not without a touch of anger, too. “We coulda been doing this ages ago. Since—”

“Since that night, yeah. I know,” Zoro sighs. Instinctively his hand twitches as though he wants to rub his temple in self-annoyance, but he tugs at the fabric covering Luffy’s back instead. “But it wasn’t entirely my fault, captain.”

Luffy’s mouth opens before his brain has had time to realise that Zoro is quite right. Luckily, Zoro is feeling well enough to steal the subsequent and very indignant words with an impeccably timed kiss. 

“Luffy,” Zoro starts, sentence breaking only when he hisses from another twinge of pain. Luffy jolts a bit, mmediately concerned. “If… I can sleep through all of tomorrow… you think we could stay here all night and catch up?”

Luffy just smiles at him, relieved. “Dumbass. Of course we can."

When the sun rises at dawn, it is the first time Luffy and Zoro have ever been awake together and not noticed the slow ascent of their local star. 

________________________________________

Whatever that strange pale scar is up there, it’s beautiful. Tonight’s sky is a deep and dark ocean studded with a billion stars and is frighteningly, unfathomably vast - more so than any sea they could sail, not in a hundred lifetimes. As many lifetimes as there are stars, even.

Zoro finds himself grinning because he can’t help wondering if one day their captain will want to sail up there, too. When he's sated, bored of being just king of the pirates, and hungry for more having conquered the Grand Line. A challenge to end all challenges- to sail to the moon and beyond. Somehow, Zoro knows it's not entirely out of the question, not with Luffy. And the sigh which then leaves him is utterly resigned, because he realises that if it were ever to happen he'd have no choice but to go along with it. To sail headfirst into the unknown abyss hanging above them, just so that he can stand beside his captain and support him to the end of the world. 

"Oi," he then murmurs, and uses his thighs to shift the heavy weight in his lap. "Luffy."

Luffy stirs. He’s actually only half asleep, and very comfortable curled up against Zoro’s partially exposed chest. “Mh?” is the guttural sounding acknowledgement Zoro then receives. “M’awake.”

“I’m one eye down here. You’re supposed to be keeping lookout with me.”

This makes Luffy grin. Like Shanks hasn’t suffered from having just one arm, Zoro is in no way disadvantaged through having only one eye. And, well, Luffy doesn’t exactly like the fact that Zoro is without an eye, but it’s not something he’s at all concerned about. 

“If Zoro wants me to sit up with him and look at the stars, all he has to do is say.” Luffy has already sat up, leaning now with his back against Zoro’s broad chest, raising his elbows just a little to let Zoro’s strong arms wrap around his waist. But when he rubs his eyes and manages to look past his swordsman (who he’s barely taken his eyes off all evening until he started falling asleep), Luffy realises what Zoro was truly hinting at. 

“Oooohhh. It’s that thing! It’s back! Jeez, when was the last time we saw that up there?!”

Zoro grins smugly, not that Luffy can see it, and rests his chin on Luffy’s shoulder to murmur against his ear. “The first time we saw this I thought it cursed me. Little did I know the curse actually came from you.”

It tickles enough to make Luffy laugh and preventatively roll his shoulder up, but this only makes Zoro nestle into his neck instead, squeezing his waist to let him know that he’s not getting away and making his captain squirm. 

There’s no way of knowing where they’ll be the next time the scar appears in space. That far ahead in the future is an intimidating place when time on and off this ship passes them by so quickly. What awaits them in that intangible place known as the future… well, the possibilities are as unknown and endless as space itself. The time they have is only ever the present, and every single day could be their last. The only thing certain in their lives is that, hard though it is to believe, eventually they will end. No amount of sailing can ever sail them away from that. It sends a shudder through Zoro just thinking about it. There’s too much in his life right now that he can think about saying goodbye to just yet, even if he’s damned sure the future holds many adventures for them yet. 

Because he’s come to find that the present is more precious than any future adventure. So long as the present means having Luffy in his arms, sitting beside him during the ship’s lookout, standing next to him as they face whatever comes their way.


End file.
